Spring Cleaning Within 2008
Spring is here and it’s time to clean up. Throw out the old; bring in the new. I’m opening my internal closets and shining light in dark corners within.
As of today, I’m trying to stop projecting perfection on the external side of my body or temple when my real estate within is not entirely clean. It’s inauthentic to those who “think” they know me and hurtful to myself – the one who has to “act” self-righteous all the time. This post has been inspired in part by Lauryn Hill’s journey over the past few years. Most people want the old 1998 Mis-Education Lauryn Hill back, but she has transcended that and moved on, yet many of her fans (including myself) have trapped her in an old box. As Nikki Giovanni once said “Even my flaws are correct”.
Oftentimes…
- I don’t listen well because I can be arrogant and think I know it all
- I’m shy because I’m afraid of letting people too close
- I’m quiet to a point of being pseudo-passive because I’m afraid of my own light
- I plan too much instead of being fully present in the moment
- I cut people off in the moments when I need to embrace them or need them to embrace me
- I project perfection because I thought perfection was more inspirational than authenticity
- I try to control life because I’m a success-aholic and lack faith
- I don’t trust people because I still haven’t truly forgiven my mother
- I’m selfish and shut down when I don’t get my way
- I’m self-righteous and act like I know what I’m doing when I don’t
I’m working on these things because they hurt me and those I care about. Post your secrets by anonymously commenting below and/or read other people’s secrets here.
Now that some of my self-inflicted boxes (or caskets) are gone, I can finally breath again. That which wants to grow is never fully grown; it always needs room to grow so I’m throwing away that which I don’t need anymore to make room.
…10 lbs lighter and breathing easier 🙂
